Oh well....

I got sad today for no reason.

Weird I know, but that's me...

I feel like no one understands me but Gabie and Kenny.

I'm so happy I meet them. They both makes me happier.

But everyone else ignores me or acts like me and that just makes things worst.

Oh well right? I just have to handle it and ignore them bad.

But I can't I am not that kinda person.

Sometimes I wish I could just disappear, But I don't because I'm to weak.

I'm a very worthless person.....

I have been having a hard time with my honors English project.

It's a drawing thing so it should be easy for me but medieval times is not my thing.

I am having a real hard time and my partner isn't helping out.

Not because he's mean but because I can't find the courage to talk to him.

See how useless I am...Can't even talk to my own partner.

I think the problem is that I like him.

But like always he doesn't like me. But this is my opinion not like I really know.

No one ever likes me anyways....

I wonder what I am even good at.

Nothing I guess....Oh well.

I wonder why life is starting to get so hard for me.

I thought everything would be easier sooner or later.

But I thought wrong.

It's okay though,  need a wake up call.

I can't live in a world that I think "one day Esme you will be happy".

I know that day will never come....

I am that worthless.

How sad I sound like a depressing person...

How stupid to think in such a way.

I guess I am just thinking the truth.

Life isn't a happy place anyways.

[I wish I could have lived in my wonder land just a little while longer.....]

Bad Luck Maybe?...

Well today my English partner told me he might be moving...well will be moving after his birthday.

Bad luck right?!

I was starting to like the guy too...

He's really cool and everything! Even tall!!!

Too bad he won't be around that long....

Well I wish him the best!

I have been really happy lately.

Which is weird because of what happened with that Norwegian guy.

Maybe I really didn't like him and just felt jealous? Or maybe it's because I like the Swedish guy?!

I don't know but either way that Swedish guy is pretty cute and smart! Not to mention Awesome!

Wish guys like that would live close to me.

Wow I am such a girl.... I always end up talking about guys....

I guess it's meant to be?

Well happier me is listening to sad music.

Weird I know.

But Hey! I love pierce the veil and I don't care if that Norwegian guy doesn't!

He's lame anyways....

Oh well. Other things are more important then him. [:

You're that person that I imaginatively kill every day. [:

Given Up

I think it's about time i give up on falling in love!
Life isn't only about love after all.
But one day i believe I will fall in love.
And that day I truly will be happy....
But for now I am so tired of showing my feelings to a person I care for and have those feelings for.
Maybe it's better off not being shown?
I don't know and I really don't want to know anymore...

Well school's going well.

I talk to more people and that guy from english class isn't such a bad partner.

He is pretty cute. Hope he doesn't find out I think that.

well if he does oh well right?

But it would be pretty awkward to talk to him....

I don't want to think about stuff like that....

I hate that I always end up thinking about that...

Well my friend Lars that lives in Norway kindly told me about how he had his first kiss today.

Wouldn't have been so bad if I didn't like him so much.

Stupid right? To like someone from another country.

I guess I'm just a stupid useless girl...

How silly of me.

I really hate you Lars....I'm so sorry...

I really need to stop being so jealous!

I just want to fade away into the sky under the sea. - PIERCE THE VEIL